I'm just not good with small town, petty, drama. I'm just too honest... Mark says I don't have a tactful bone in my body.
When Levi was small I couldn't figure out how to teach him tact without feeling as if I was teaching him to lie - and I HATE liars. So, I didn't teach him any and now he's probably as bad if not worse than I am about just telling it like it is.
Anyway, this whole deal with buying the case business and then not buying the case business has turned out to be one huge melodrama.
David (owner) came over to talk with Mark last night. You have to give him kudos for having balls enough to show up over here. He got out of his truck apologizing.
Come to find out, the whole backing out thing was an attempt to pacify his demanding little wife and her family (mostly Mother - who is the woman who does my hair, who is the woman who started the whole thing by telling me the business was for sale in the first place).
They didn't want David to sell the business, they wanted him to continue working it even though that it is NOT what he wants to do.
So, he backed off the sale and told them that if they wanted the business so damn bad they could run it...
of course, that isn't ever going to happen and now they want David to try to get us to buy it.
We told him that we were sorry for all his trouble but we just don't want anything to do with it EVER.
I don't deal with crazy people.
In fact, I am so cold hearted that I completely cut contact with my middle brother for just such crap. He was married to a crazy woman who loved her drama and was always trying to pull us into the middle of some crazy shit - especially Mark who is such a sweet guy that he couldn't see what she was doing and was always willing to try to help.
I finally put my foot down and told them both no more (this is after she dropped off my 3 month old nephew at our house and didn't come back for a week). I told her never to come back to my house and I told my brother I was done with them; that they were both crazy as bedbugs...
and,
I DON'T DEAL WITH CRAZY PEOPLE.
5 comments:
A- In the way of faith I was raised, being a 'Christian' often looked like being tactful and lying - I have been uncovering those parts of me that still believe in that, although I am very forthright with most people. Last night, we had some new neighbors and some old neighbors over for dinner - not a big party just a simple gathering, we did not invite the neighbors across the street because it tends to be a drama when they are invited. Now it's a drama anyway because the woman of that family is mad at us for not inviting them, and locked her door in my face when I went over there. I have been holding this in the Light, asking for Truth in how to love my neighbor to be made known. L tells me it probably starts with being honest with her, if she wants to be honest. Your post today, of speaking truth and making a choice to not deal with crazy people also spoke to me. I guess Lady Wisdom is Truth too. Thanks for writing this, even as I am sorry that you have had to and are still dealing with this situation.
Anj, a lot of what I've read lately speaks of women having to learn to be true to themselves - first! To be able to see a situation that is going to do nothing but cause you unrest and pain and choose your best interest by not engaging in those situations. I know for myself and most women it is hard to put ourselves first - it goes against everything we've been taught down thru the ages.
But, it can start with us!!
What you do is a little thing that I have heard called
"Preserving Your Sanity"
Refusing to marinate in drama or participate in the drama of other people I think is just a normal response of healthy living.
You aren't cold hearted, you just aren't co-dependent.
I am happy for you and your family that you choose to not deal with crazy people.
I think I need to use your motto instead of mine.....hahahaa, mine for quit a while now has been "I don't deal with Bullshit, or the Bullshit of other's lives" But your's is much nicer said "I don't deal with Crazy People." hahahaa. I've ended one such relationship just a month or so ago, I was never real good friends with this person, but she was in our big group of friends that always hung out, her an her husband, I tried very hard to be nice and friendly she's 28, and has no idea how to truely be happy....she is just all over the place and "Bit@@@@" so much about everything that I'd rather smack her up side the head then listen to her. It finally came to a head when they got mad at me and Keith for not wanting to go on a long motorcycle ride with them, instead we had planned on going for a short ride just the 2 of us then spending the rest of the day goofing with the kids.....and that's exactly what we did. Well weeks go by and we're cordial and such and one night it came to a head and I smack her upside the head.....(Shame on me, I know.) But she had ran her mouth a few too many times.....so I let my anger go.....I did appologize the next day for the way I acted, but I told her I would not appologize for wanting to be with my family like I did, and it would be best if we were never friends again.....End of story......
I posted this on our other blog but thought I would add it here..
... a woman is harassed by the petty demands of her psyche which exhort her to comply with whatever anyone wishes.
Compliance causes a shocking realization that must be registered by all women. That is, to be ourselves causes us to exiled by many others, and yet to comply with what others want causes us to be exiled from ourselves.
It is a tormenting tension and it must be done, but the choice is clear.
Women Who Run With Wolves
Clarissa Pinklola Estes
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