It has just been a very nice day, nothing special or unusual but nice.

Levi brought Zoe over to me mid-morning so they could get their house ready to bug bomb. I love that little girl. She is turning in to such a character. The funniest thing she is doing right now is this little fake laugh. I think she may turn out to be a smarty-pants just like her Daddy. She is almost there with crawling, doing the up on all fours, rocking back and forth.. won't be long now. She rolls and scoots to get wherever she wants to go.

After they set off the bug bombs they all hung out at the house all afternoon. Let's hope the fleas are gone once and for all.

Mark worked in the studio all day but the band feels like family so there was lots of coming and going. They are going to work part of the day tomorrow and then use our studio for their weekly practice.

Seth has been working on his Tahoe. Something was wrong with the headlights but he and his Dad got it fixed.

Our weather has cooled off considerably. It was bearable to be outside. I've been working on cleaning out one of my flower beds that I let die in the heat. (the only thing I have watered is the vegetable garden).

I am getting LOTS of tomatoes. I made one quart of juice yesterday and probably have enough tomatoes to do at least two more tomorrow. Everything else is dying out, except the okra and it is just getting started. I'm thinking about tilling up the green beans to plant some fall veggies.

I'm reading "I know why the caged bird sings" by Maya Angelou. I had never read anything other than her poetry. I really like her writing.

Okay, enough rambling for tonight... off to play Farm Town.

It was about 8:30, right before dark, but, still light enough to see any critters I didn't want to put my hand on and I had been picking tomatoes, cucumbers, squash, and a few okra from my lovely little garden. I stopped to move the rain bird so I could turn it on in the morning. I started across the bridge headed back to the house, slowly, stopping to pet Rufus who was butting against my leg wanting attention. I looked across my back yard towards the pool and as always am just amazed at the beauty of the place where I live. We don't have majestic mountains or bubbling streams, we don't have oceans, but to me it is beautiful. The pecan grove stands majestic, 50 - 75' tall trees line each side of the grove with a little dip in the middle which creates the nicest breeze on the whole place. The grass recently mowed looks like a golf course that stretches out into fields of native tall grasses.

It makes my heart sing.

All of a sudden an overwhelming sadness came over me.

The thought that in not too many years I won't be here anymore to take care of this place. I wondered if Seth will? Levi is pretty career driven and I doubt that he will be here much longer.

I wondered if my Mom had the same thoughts in those years after Daddy died and before we came to live here? and the relief she must have felt when she saw how much I love the place.

I guess what brought this on is the upcoming birthday. I will be 55 years old this year. Honey, that's old. I am eligible for Senior Citizens discounts now.. geez.

Getting old is so freaking weird. You don't get old in your mind, but your body betrays you. Sometimes I look in the mirror and just can't believe it is me. You are not sure how you are supposed to act when you are old. I don't want to be a silly old woman trying to act like a teen but I don't' want to be an old lady either.

I used to think I would be okay with dying once my kids were all grown and settled in their lives. But, I want to watch Zoe grow up. And there is always Emily... who could possibly love her like I do? Who would ever have the patience to take care of her?

It's a hard blow when your own mortality smacks you in the face.

cucumber dill dip

dice fresh cucumbers in very small pieces or grate (I prefer the diced)
salt and let stand for about 10 minutes
drain
add sour cream enough to make a dip like consistency
(you could probably use plain yogurt, I've just never tried it)
and fresh dill to taste, chopped very fine

I don't have any exact proportions for this since I just kind of made it up. It's very good with fish.

I am not, or hardly ever, easily bored. As a teenager, when people usually become bored, my Dad just would not put up with it. He always said "Bored people are boring people" and if you didn't have something to do he would surely find something for you.

But tonight I am restless.

Mark is in the studio and probably will be for several more hours. Television most of the time just makes me want to scream. I have a pretty good book that I am reading. Zoe just left. and yet, I am still restless.

Facebook didn't help. Nothing to do on Farm Town. Reading the local newspaper only takes minutes. ......

If I go in the house I will probably eat and I sure as heck don't need to do that, so, I guess I will bore you with my rattling.

We are creeping back up to normal July temperatures. Shoot. At least when it was 105 we didn't have mosquito problems. The weather channel predicts above 100 degrees for the next 5 days, at least.

My garden is still just lovely. The marigolds, zinnias, and sunflowers (all volunteer) have completely taken over the green beans. oh, well. they are so pretty. I am getting more cucumbers, squash, and tomatoes than we can eat, but, I'm trying my best :) Christi looked at me while I stood over the sink eating a tomato like an apple and said "Don't you have trouble with indigestion?" "yeah... what's your point?"

I would share with you if you weren't so far away :)

The house suddenly got dark. I knew what was coming. I stopped what I was doing and went outside to greet it. I have a bench up at the gate where you can see the open space along the highway, I chose to sit there and wait. The black clouds rolled and tumbled from the northeast headed southwest at an almost alarming speed. I closed my eyes and breathed and waited. It's almost here. You can smell it. The wind comes first, hard and cool. Oh how wonderful it feels compared to normal July weather in Oklahoma. It doesn't last long, it's moving too fast. I can see the rain falling in sheets across the bridge.. another hundred yards to go.

Rain. Hard driving, I call it power wash rain.

and then it's over.

summers back but not quiet so mean.

So, did everyone see the rep from Oklahoma,Sally Kern, on the news today telling all of America that our economic woes are caused by our moral decay? Homosexuality is the reason all these people are losing jobs, losing homes, living in tents... really Ms Kern?? really.

and here I thought is was ignorance and greed which there is no one more guilty of than the super religious.

The guys did survive the day, but, they were wiped out when they finally dragged in about 1:30 this morning.

The thing is that the people who plan these outdoor events like festivals don't have a clue what this involves for us. I mean if you had never been involved in the PA/sound system end of it how could you? We have a medium sized PA and for us to get set up it takes at least 3 hours to unload and set up the front-of-house speakers and the monitor system, the FOH mixing console, the monitor console, the effects units, compressors, etc. etc and then we have to run miles of cables to connect all of that together. Then there is stage to get set up with mic stands and microphones and more miles of cabling. If the band uses in-ear monitors that has to be set up. Then when the band shows up all the instruments have to be placed, microphones run to them, and more cables. Then it all has to be fired up, amplifiers set, tested and then 4 or 5 hours after we got there we are ready for sound check where something always happens that has to be fixed or rearranged. Then the first band goes on stage at six, plays an hour to an hour and a half, time for the next band... instruments have to be hauled off stage and new ones brought on, set up, adjusted, miked and ready to play (they usually give us 15 to 20 minutes to accomplish that).

Yesterday there were five bands. Mark and Seth got there at noon, the last band started playing at eleven. So they worked,nonstop, in 100+ degree weather for 12 hours. And, then they had to tear it all down, load it in the trailer and drive home.

We got paid $1500 and paid two hands (and people act like we are robbing them)

To say the least, my husband works hard for his money. But, he does it all because once it is set up and ready to go and he is standing behind that monster 40 channel mixing console, he creates magic. He can make a garage band sound like rock stars and give him a bunch of good musicians and he will blow your mind with how good it sounds.

And, they will be doing it again next weekend in another town at another festival.